The Bunker(Monologue)

It’s funny you found your way down here, I’ll be honest it’s been a really, really, really long time since we had anyone down here. Don’t get me wrong I don’t mind the company, doesn’t bother me. It’s just we designed the tunnels in all so they’d be hard to follow down to the old bunker, We covered all the cave entrances with rocks, cleaned up all the footprints heck even went through 

trouble of hiding 25,000 feet of heavy duty electrical wires so the rats wouldn’t chem em, unfortunately they weren’t thick enough, and we fried half a dozen men doing that.  But here you are, a miracle intruder if you will. Hey is it still hot up their? More important you didn’t happen to prop the door open on your way in did you? No, well that’s ok. Since you managed to get yourself down here and since you took the time to barge uninvited, and since the doors all automatically lock from the outside. I welcome you, to my humble recluse.  We’ve got oh 8 years of food left, well I don’t wanna make assumptions but based on your size maybe 6  6 and ½ if we’re careful. This here bunker is compartmentalized into 4 separate floors. When they built this place they wanted it to last forever, they put a lot of effort into that. unfortunately they put a bit less effort into the people, going in the bunker, and well they weren’t residents for very long. Anywho first floor is our living quarters, where we are now, It’s not a lot but it’s enough for one hermit, second floor mechanical equipment, old construction machines, nothing we have much use for now, cept for burying things that go bad after while, funny they never really stopped building, sometimes it’s fun to go walk around, they carved tunnels in and out goes on for miles, and miles, like a maze or the catacombs based on how you look at it. Always make sure you bring a buddy, a pal, when you go on walks, unfortunately you’re kind of stuck with me, though I try to be clingy, and I do have a life so if I’m not available or if you can’t find me for whatever reason you can bring a body, we’ve got lots of those, they start to drag on you after a bit though, and they’re not great for directions but they are great listeners. Just don’t want you wandering off, going places. I don’t know who designed the second floor but man it is really easy to get turned around, if you don’t have a detailed map, and keys to doors, and construction designs. Any who third floor, we do not go on. Yes yes the I know there’s that worn out button in the elevator, I just want to make sure you come back to me at the end of the day, so pretend that button doesn’t exist, and get over it. Honestly though if you really want to feel like you’re on the floor below you it’s probably a structural hazard but the space between floors is so thin if you put your ear to ground can basically hear what’s happening below you and man you’ll hear some things, I call those stubborn ones they just don’t give up. Sometimes I like to knock on the ground to see if I get a response.Maybe a faint whimper or whisper. So that’s kind of fun .Anyway 4th floors is storage. Books, food, clothes, we got lots of clothes now. Fourth floor probably my favorite, down here you can hear the song the bunker sings as it creaks, and groans, almost like it’s talking to ya, like it’s trying to warn ya about something. So yeah in summary 2nd floor great for walks, if ya like mazes, 3rd floors Darkness, Dark darkness. No one will see the things that happen to you down there, not even you, or the the things doing things to you, it’s that dark. 4th floor peachy.  Though in truth we have no peaches, or fruit. Cause you know goes bad. I told Jim to go get canned fruit but I he never made in back in time. I wonder if the heat got to him. So that’s the bunker, it’s not much but it’ll have to do because you didn’t prop the door open on your way in, I can’t promise you much, so we’ll see how long you last, hopefully a while cause I get lonely.


*Tone should be lighthearted yet unnerving, allow for the moments of humor to hang slightly before moving on*

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